{Taylor's P.O.V}
As the cab pulls up to l'Hopitale Generale de les Champs, I feel my throat tighten. The long ride to the hospital was agonizing, the kinds of thoughts that were running through my mind were slowly killing me. If she was dead... I couldn't even begin to think. Jasey Rae was everything important to me right now, and if I had to give up my hockey career and the Memorial Cup to make sure she was okay, I would. In a heartbeat. I thanked the cabbie sincerely, and threw him just over 500 dollars. I didn't really have the money right now, but it didn't matter.
I basically sprinted to the Emergency Room, and by the time I was at the front desk, I was out of breath.
"Hi," I said, breathlessly.
"How can I help you today," the receptionist says, peering over her glasses.
"My name's Taylor Hall. I'm looking for Jasey Rae Carmichael? She was a part of the plane crash that happened around here earlier."
"Let me just make a call to the trauma sector, they'll let me know. One minute please." She said, nodding towards the waiting area.
I plopped myself down on one of the chairs and sat silently for what felt like hours before a doctor came.
"Taylor Hall?" They asked, standing in front of me as I got up to my feet.
"Yeah, that's me." I responded, starting to get more and more nervous. I just wanted her to be okay.
"Please follow me." the doctor said, and I followed her through two bog plastic doors marked "Trauma" and into an elevator up to the third floor.
"She's right in there." the doctor said, half smiling.
I walked in and saw Jasey, asleep, all hooked up to different IVs looking paler and weaker than ever.
I rushed to her side, and grabbed her hand so tightly that it woke her up and tears began flowing down my cheeks.
"Jasey." I said, kissing her hand and squeezing it tighter.
"Taylor..." she said weakly, still half asleep. "What happened? Where's Mickey?"
Friday, August 20, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Constantly Changing From Calm to Hell - Seventeen
{Taylor's P.O.V}
It had been almost two hours since I had landed, and Jasey was still no where to be seen. I paced back and forth through baggage claim trying to take my mind off of the thousands of awful thoughts that were swarming my mind. I'm sure the flight was just delayed or something. I tried to convince myself, sitting down on a bench and staring at my watch for the 60th time in the past three minutes.
"Hey man, bus is leaving for the hotel now, you coming with?" My teammate Kenny Ryan said, patting me on the shoulder.
"Nah, you guys go without me, tell Coach I'll take a cab, alright?" I said, getting up. "I'm gonna head over to Services and see if they have any news on Jasey's flight."
"Kay, take it easy buddy, I'm sure she's fine." Kenny says, half smiling at me then taking off.
I approach the counter, and grab the attention of a 50-something looking woman who's name tag reads Carol.
"What can I do for you sweetheart?" She says, and gives me a smile.
"Hi, I just wanted to inquire about a flight?" I say, letting out another sigh, "My girlfriends on it, and it was supposed to arrive over two hours ago, there's no information on the board."
"Would that possibly be the flight coming in from Windsor?" She suddenly looked concerned, making my heart skip a few beats.
"Yes.." I say slowly, bracing myself.
"I'm sorry, that flight had to make an emergency landing about half an hour away from Quebec City. Awful turbulence." She shook her head.
"Is anyone hurt?!" I panicked, thinking of Jasey somewhere in a hospital alone.
"The report said there had been some severe injuries, but nothing else has been released." She smiled weakly at me, slipping me a piece of paper. "Here's the address of the hospital everybody's at."
"Thank you so much," I say, my voice quivering.
I bolt from the desk and to where all the taxi's were lined up outside. I hopped into the backseat of the first one I saw, throwing my suitcase and hockey bag next to me.
"I need to go to 112 rue de les Champs. It's the General Hospital in Quebec City." I say quickly.
"Quebec City?! That's at least a two hour drive from here. I'm sorry, can't take you there." The cabbie says, shrugging.
"Look, sir, my girlfriend was just in a plane crash, and all I really need to know is that she's okay. She needs to be okay. I've already lost one person important to me this year, I rather not lose another one, so can you please just go? I triple whatever the fare is." I manage to spit out all in one breath.
"Ahh, I guess I can make an exception. For love right?" The cabbie says as he begins to pull out of the airport, and on to the highway.
For love... It was going to be a fucking long cab ride.
It had been almost two hours since I had landed, and Jasey was still no where to be seen. I paced back and forth through baggage claim trying to take my mind off of the thousands of awful thoughts that were swarming my mind. I'm sure the flight was just delayed or something. I tried to convince myself, sitting down on a bench and staring at my watch for the 60th time in the past three minutes.
"Hey man, bus is leaving for the hotel now, you coming with?" My teammate Kenny Ryan said, patting me on the shoulder.
"Nah, you guys go without me, tell Coach I'll take a cab, alright?" I said, getting up. "I'm gonna head over to Services and see if they have any news on Jasey's flight."
"Kay, take it easy buddy, I'm sure she's fine." Kenny says, half smiling at me then taking off.
I approach the counter, and grab the attention of a 50-something looking woman who's name tag reads Carol.
"What can I do for you sweetheart?" She says, and gives me a smile.
"Hi, I just wanted to inquire about a flight?" I say, letting out another sigh, "My girlfriends on it, and it was supposed to arrive over two hours ago, there's no information on the board."
"Would that possibly be the flight coming in from Windsor?" She suddenly looked concerned, making my heart skip a few beats.
"Yes.." I say slowly, bracing myself.
"I'm sorry, that flight had to make an emergency landing about half an hour away from Quebec City. Awful turbulence." She shook her head.
"Is anyone hurt?!" I panicked, thinking of Jasey somewhere in a hospital alone.
"The report said there had been some severe injuries, but nothing else has been released." She smiled weakly at me, slipping me a piece of paper. "Here's the address of the hospital everybody's at."
"Thank you so much," I say, my voice quivering.
I bolt from the desk and to where all the taxi's were lined up outside. I hopped into the backseat of the first one I saw, throwing my suitcase and hockey bag next to me.
"I need to go to 112 rue de les Champs. It's the General Hospital in Quebec City." I say quickly.
"Quebec City?! That's at least a two hour drive from here. I'm sorry, can't take you there." The cabbie says, shrugging.
"Look, sir, my girlfriend was just in a plane crash, and all I really need to know is that she's okay. She needs to be okay. I've already lost one person important to me this year, I rather not lose another one, so can you please just go? I triple whatever the fare is." I manage to spit out all in one breath.
"Ahh, I guess I can make an exception. For love right?" The cabbie says as he begins to pull out of the airport, and on to the highway.
For love... It was going to be a fucking long cab ride.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Like the Sea - Sixteen
I was still shaky as we headed to the front desk to check in for our flight. As the lady ran our information through the computer, I took a minute to examine the ring. It wasn't anything too elaborate, seeing as Mickey didn't have much money yet. It was one sparkling diamond, set on top of a silver band. It was simple. It was gorgeous. Taylor squeezed my hand as the stewardess typed furiously on the computer, with a look of frustration planted on her face.
"I'm sorry," she said, looking up at us apologetically, "There seems to have been an error in our system. Ms. Carmichael, I'm going to have to put you on a later flight."
"There's no way you can fit us both on one flight?" Taylor asked, disappointed.
"No, I'm sorry, both flights are now booked." She said as she printed off our tickets. "There's only an hour delay in between the flights, so you shouldn't be arriving in Rimouski much later than Mr. Hall."
"It's okay." I said, smiling reassuringly to Taylor.
"Will you be alright?" Taylor asked, clearly concerned.
"I'll be fine!" I laughed, "I've been on a plane before."
"Okay." Taylor said kissing the top of my head, still obviously worried. "I'll see you when you land, alright?"
"Of course." I say, standing up on my tippy-toes to give Taylor a quick kiss.
"Have a safe flight, okay?" Taylor said, kissing me again.
"Thanks," I blush, "You too."
As Taylor headed to his gate to board his plane, I found a seat at the bar and ordered a few drinks. Before I knew it, my flight was being announced, and I was told to go board the plane. I found my seat in the plane, and drifted off to sleep, only to be awaken an hour later, by intense shaking. The seat-belt sign had flashed on, and the pilot was making an announcement.
"We are going to be hitting some extreme turbulence, everybody remain calm, and stay in your seats."
I gripped tightly onto my arm rest, and felt the plane lunge forwards. My stomach was doing somersaults, and my legs were trembling. Was this it? Was this plane going to crash, and that would be the end of me? The overhead compartments were rattling, and the plane lights kept flickering on and off. I heard a droning sound, and suddenly all the plane lights were off, and the emergency lights have been turned on. I closed my eyes and prayed that I would be okay. I held on tighter to the arm rests, and let out a cry as I felt the plane drop again. The compartments were now open, and luggage was falling all over the place. I screamed as I saw something fall out of the compartment, I felt it hit my head hard, making it throb then everything went black.
"I'm sorry," she said, looking up at us apologetically, "There seems to have been an error in our system. Ms. Carmichael, I'm going to have to put you on a later flight."
"There's no way you can fit us both on one flight?" Taylor asked, disappointed.
"No, I'm sorry, both flights are now booked." She said as she printed off our tickets. "There's only an hour delay in between the flights, so you shouldn't be arriving in Rimouski much later than Mr. Hall."
"It's okay." I said, smiling reassuringly to Taylor.
"Will you be alright?" Taylor asked, clearly concerned.
"I'll be fine!" I laughed, "I've been on a plane before."
"Okay." Taylor said kissing the top of my head, still obviously worried. "I'll see you when you land, alright?"
"Of course." I say, standing up on my tippy-toes to give Taylor a quick kiss.
"Have a safe flight, okay?" Taylor said, kissing me again.
"Thanks," I blush, "You too."
As Taylor headed to his gate to board his plane, I found a seat at the bar and ordered a few drinks. Before I knew it, my flight was being announced, and I was told to go board the plane. I found my seat in the plane, and drifted off to sleep, only to be awaken an hour later, by intense shaking. The seat-belt sign had flashed on, and the pilot was making an announcement.
"We are going to be hitting some extreme turbulence, everybody remain calm, and stay in your seats."
I gripped tightly onto my arm rest, and felt the plane lunge forwards. My stomach was doing somersaults, and my legs were trembling. Was this it? Was this plane going to crash, and that would be the end of me? The overhead compartments were rattling, and the plane lights kept flickering on and off. I heard a droning sound, and suddenly all the plane lights were off, and the emergency lights have been turned on. I closed my eyes and prayed that I would be okay. I held on tighter to the arm rests, and let out a cry as I felt the plane drop again. The compartments were now open, and luggage was falling all over the place. I screamed as I saw something fall out of the compartment, I felt it hit my head hard, making it throb then everything went black.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
I've Become a Simple Souvenir of Someone's Kill - Fifteen
After hazily hopping into the shower together, I zipped up my suitcase and waited at my door for Taylor. He emerged from the washroom, grinning at me and making my heart pound in my chest. God, he was beautiful. Every girl in Windsor would kill to be with him, and he chose me. For some inconceivable reason, he chose broken-down me.
He jestured to his back suggestively, and I hopped on and laughed, wrapping my legs around his waist. He turned his head slightly so he could see me out of the corner of his eye, and winked at me, before carrying me and my suitcase out of my place, dropping me off carefully in the front seat of his car.
"Does Coach know that I'm going to accompanying you to the Finals?" I asked as Taylor started the car, and backed out of my driveway.
"Nope." Taylor said, chuckling a bit, "He said no girlfriends on the trip, I'm gonna have to sneak you around."
"Sounds like an adventure to me," I laughed.
We parked the car in the airport parking, and wheeled our suitcases onto the main floor, to check our bags. As we were waiting in line, I thought saw a familiar face, and froze. I tensed up and stood still, feeling my breath get caught up in my throat. It couldn't be. Standing fifteen feet away from me, I thought I saw Mickey. I clasped my mouth and gasped, as I shook my head, getting Taylor's attention.
"Is something wrong?" he asked, concerned, taking my hand and facing me.
"Mickey..." was all I managed to say before running up to the man, only to see that it wasn't Mickey, it was in fact his older brother, David.
"Oh god, David." I said, sighing disappointed.
"Jasey Rae." David said, staring at me bewildered.
"Sorry, you look so much like your brother. I thought..." I trailed off, and David pulled me into a hug.
"How are you holding up?" he asked, continuing to stare at me curiously.
"Better." I said forcing a smile. It was scary how similar they looked. They had the same big blue eyes and messy blonde hair, always tucked under a hat. Their cheeks were the same slightly rosy color, and they both had the same defiant nose. It was like he was right in front of me. I reached out and touched David's face, tracing the same bone structure that Mickey had.
"You look so much like him," I repeated, beggining to tear up. Only to feel Taylor's reassuring hand on my shoulder seconds later.
"Taylor," David said, nodding at him.
"Hows it going man?" Taylor asked, shaking hand with him.
"Its been rough. Especially around the family," He said, shaking his head. "Thought I'd get out of Windsor for a bit, cheer on you guys in the finals."
"We apprecaite it, bud." Taylor said, massaging my shoulders as I began to shake. The ressemblance was terrifying.
"Jasey," David said, pulling something out of his suitcase. "Mick was going to give this to you before he died, he gave it to me to hold onto because he was afraid you'd find it." He handed me a tiny black velvet box, and I began to choke up.
"What is this?" I whispered, rubbing the box.
"Open it." David said sighing.
I flipped the box open, and inside lay a tiny diamond ring, all done up in silver. I clasped my mouth and began breathig harder, as tears fell out of my eyes.
I picked up the ring, and saw engraved on the inside the words "Save my life" and the numbers 18.07.06. The day we met, and words to his favorite song. I was shaking viciously, as Taylor pulled me towards him, and wrapped his arms around me tightly.
Mickey was going to propose. I wouldve said yes. If he hadn't died, I wouldve been engaged to him. It was too much for me, I held onto Taylor for my life, slipped the ring onto my ring finger, and cried.
I heard half of a scream escape my mouth, and then the sounds of Taylor whispering in my ear that he loved me.
"I'll always be here for you," Taylor whispered, kissing my head as the tears keep pouring.
"Ill never let you go."
He jestured to his back suggestively, and I hopped on and laughed, wrapping my legs around his waist. He turned his head slightly so he could see me out of the corner of his eye, and winked at me, before carrying me and my suitcase out of my place, dropping me off carefully in the front seat of his car.
"Does Coach know that I'm going to accompanying you to the Finals?" I asked as Taylor started the car, and backed out of my driveway.
"Nope." Taylor said, chuckling a bit, "He said no girlfriends on the trip, I'm gonna have to sneak you around."
"Sounds like an adventure to me," I laughed.
We parked the car in the airport parking, and wheeled our suitcases onto the main floor, to check our bags. As we were waiting in line, I thought saw a familiar face, and froze. I tensed up and stood still, feeling my breath get caught up in my throat. It couldn't be. Standing fifteen feet away from me, I thought I saw Mickey. I clasped my mouth and gasped, as I shook my head, getting Taylor's attention.
"Is something wrong?" he asked, concerned, taking my hand and facing me.
"Mickey..." was all I managed to say before running up to the man, only to see that it wasn't Mickey, it was in fact his older brother, David.
"Oh god, David." I said, sighing disappointed.
"Jasey Rae." David said, staring at me bewildered.
"Sorry, you look so much like your brother. I thought..." I trailed off, and David pulled me into a hug.
"How are you holding up?" he asked, continuing to stare at me curiously.
"Better." I said forcing a smile. It was scary how similar they looked. They had the same big blue eyes and messy blonde hair, always tucked under a hat. Their cheeks were the same slightly rosy color, and they both had the same defiant nose. It was like he was right in front of me. I reached out and touched David's face, tracing the same bone structure that Mickey had.
"You look so much like him," I repeated, beggining to tear up. Only to feel Taylor's reassuring hand on my shoulder seconds later.
"Taylor," David said, nodding at him.
"Hows it going man?" Taylor asked, shaking hand with him.
"Its been rough. Especially around the family," He said, shaking his head. "Thought I'd get out of Windsor for a bit, cheer on you guys in the finals."
"We apprecaite it, bud." Taylor said, massaging my shoulders as I began to shake. The ressemblance was terrifying.
"Jasey," David said, pulling something out of his suitcase. "Mick was going to give this to you before he died, he gave it to me to hold onto because he was afraid you'd find it." He handed me a tiny black velvet box, and I began to choke up.
"What is this?" I whispered, rubbing the box.
"Open it." David said sighing.
I flipped the box open, and inside lay a tiny diamond ring, all done up in silver. I clasped my mouth and began breathig harder, as tears fell out of my eyes.
I picked up the ring, and saw engraved on the inside the words "Save my life" and the numbers 18.07.06. The day we met, and words to his favorite song. I was shaking viciously, as Taylor pulled me towards him, and wrapped his arms around me tightly.
Mickey was going to propose. I wouldve said yes. If he hadn't died, I wouldve been engaged to him. It was too much for me, I held onto Taylor for my life, slipped the ring onto my ring finger, and cried.
I heard half of a scream escape my mouth, and then the sounds of Taylor whispering in my ear that he loved me.
"I'll always be here for you," Taylor whispered, kissing my head as the tears keep pouring.
"Ill never let you go."
Posted from Blogium for iPhone
Saturday, June 26, 2010
#1 Overall
Taylor Hall.
Drafted.
Number one overall.
Omg.
Is this real life?
I've been watching this guy play since his first year in Windsor, and I think it's incredible how much he's grown as a player. I can't believe the day has actually come where he's been drafted. Unbelievable <3
So in Taylor spirit, a friend of mine started a Taylor Hall story, and I think y'all should read/follow/comment.
http://taylorhallx4.blogspot.com/
Chapter 14 is on it's way soon, sorry for the long breaks in between chapters, I'm going to try and update more regularly. When I first started this story, I never thought that I'd get to 19 followers. This is crazy. So thanks for all the comments and feedback I've been getting, it really helps me get more done. The more comments, the faster I write.
Peace, <3
Drafted.
Number one overall.
Omg.
Is this real life?
I've been watching this guy play since his first year in Windsor, and I think it's incredible how much he's grown as a player. I can't believe the day has actually come where he's been drafted. Unbelievable <3
So in Taylor spirit, a friend of mine started a Taylor Hall story, and I think y'all should read/follow/comment.
http://taylorhallx4.blogspot.com/
Chapter 14 is on it's way soon, sorry for the long breaks in between chapters, I'm going to try and update more regularly. When I first started this story, I never thought that I'd get to 19 followers. This is crazy. So thanks for all the comments and feedback I've been getting, it really helps me get more done. The more comments, the faster I write.
Peace, <3
Could it be This Misery Will Subside - Fourteen
The Spitfires were headed to the Memorial Cup, in Rimouski, and Taylor had asked me to go with him. Naturally, I had accepted. Any reason to leave Windsor for a few days was a good one. I laid my suitcase on my bed, and tossed in a pile of clothes, searching around the room for things I might possibly need. I was furiously digging through a pile of clothes I had in my closet for Mickey's jersey, when I heard a knock on my door. I jumped up and ran to the door, smiling widely as Taylor stood there, hair all ruffled, with Mickey's jersey over his shoulder. He leant down and gave me a kiss, before throwing the jersey over my head.
"You left this at my place a few days ago." Taylor said winking, "Thought you'd might want it back."
"Thank you" I smiled and headed back to my room, peeling the jersey off of my head and folding it nicely into my suitcase.
"You ready to go?" Taylor said, walking into my room with a mug of coffee for me.
"Just about," I said, taking the mug from Taylor, "Do you see anything else I need to pack?"
Taylor wondered around my room, looking through piles of clothes scattered everywhere. He stopped, and picked something up that I couldn't see, and grinned widely.
"What is it?" I asked, hopping off my bed.
"I think you need to pack these," Taylor said, spinning around and flashing me a pair of black lace underwear, "We've got a hotel room to ourselves."
"You're such a perv, Hall." I said, snatching the underwear from him and winking. "Plus, I feel like these would be a distraction from your hockey." I said waving the underwear in his face.
"Oh, I don't mind a distraction now and then." Taylor said, stepping closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pressing his lips onto mine softly.
"Well," I said, pulling away from him and smiling, "I guess I'll pack them then"
I threw the underwear in my suitcase, then felt Taylor pounce on my back, wrestling me onto the bed. I laughed and tried to push him off of me, but he didn't budge. He just leaned down, and kissed me, sending an electrical current all over my body. Instinctively, I wriggled my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, deepening the once innocent kiss. He broke away for a moment, and looked at me with his big blue eyes. One look was enough, then I peeled off his tshirt and he did the same to mine. A few more minutes passed by and our clothes had scattered all accross the room. He kissed my forehead gently, and then... bliss.
"You left this at my place a few days ago." Taylor said winking, "Thought you'd might want it back."
"Thank you" I smiled and headed back to my room, peeling the jersey off of my head and folding it nicely into my suitcase.
"You ready to go?" Taylor said, walking into my room with a mug of coffee for me.
"Just about," I said, taking the mug from Taylor, "Do you see anything else I need to pack?"
Taylor wondered around my room, looking through piles of clothes scattered everywhere. He stopped, and picked something up that I couldn't see, and grinned widely.
"What is it?" I asked, hopping off my bed.
"I think you need to pack these," Taylor said, spinning around and flashing me a pair of black lace underwear, "We've got a hotel room to ourselves."
"You're such a perv, Hall." I said, snatching the underwear from him and winking. "Plus, I feel like these would be a distraction from your hockey." I said waving the underwear in his face.
"Oh, I don't mind a distraction now and then." Taylor said, stepping closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist and pressing his lips onto mine softly.
"Well," I said, pulling away from him and smiling, "I guess I'll pack them then"
I threw the underwear in my suitcase, then felt Taylor pounce on my back, wrestling me onto the bed. I laughed and tried to push him off of me, but he didn't budge. He just leaned down, and kissed me, sending an electrical current all over my body. Instinctively, I wriggled my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, deepening the once innocent kiss. He broke away for a moment, and looked at me with his big blue eyes. One look was enough, then I peeled off his tshirt and he did the same to mine. A few more minutes passed by and our clothes had scattered all accross the room. He kissed my forehead gently, and then... bliss.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
All the Worries That Occupy the Back of my Mind // Thirteen
Hangover. Beautiful. I thought as I woke up the next morning my head pounding as if there was an African Tribal Ceremony going on in my brain. I turned myself over in my bed only to see that Taylor wasn't there. I sat up and pulled my hair into a messy bun on top of my head, and saw a glass of water and two Advils on my bedside table. Tucked under the glass of water was a note from Taylor.
Practice this morning, sorry I'm not there to help ease your hangover. Take the Advil, and I hope you feel better soon. I should be back around 11.
ps: Chocolate cake in the fridge. Score.
pps: I found your camera, it's on the living room table. Pick it up?
ppps: I love you.
-T
I felt a grin appear on my face and I slid the note back onto the table, picking up the Advil and glass of water and downing the two pills and half of the water. ppps: I love you. He said he loved me. He loves me. I simply shook my head and smiled. I walked over to the kitchen and grabbed the chocolate cake out of the fridge, laughing a little at the smiley face Taylor had attempted to draw on the cake in whipped cream.
He tried so hard to make me forget about everything that has brought me down in the past couple of months, I don't know what kind of person it takes to be that kind of constant tower of support with almost no backup. I've been so involved with mourning my loss, that I've almost forgotten how hard this must be on Taylor too.
I knew that even if this romantic stint we've been going on ended for one reason or another, he'd always be my best friend. He'd always be there. He was stable. I could say anything to Taylor, and he'd always be supportive of me. As I walked towards the couch, I saw my camera laying on the table, and it made my head spin. I hadn't touched, or even looked, at my camera since Mickey died.
Mickey was the one who bought me my first camera, signed me up for my first course, and encouraged me to apply to Ryerson for the fall. Everything about my photography had to do with Mickey. I stared at my camera blankly. I didn't move. I finally took a deep breath, reached out for my camera, and held it for the first time in two months. It felt different now, for some reason, my camera felt heavier, like there was a bigger weight being carried around with it.
Attached to the shutter button was a yellow post-it note with the words Use me scribbled on in Taylor's hand writing. I hit the power button, and heard my camera begin to adjust itself to the lighting in my living room. I felt my hands tighten around the lens, as I turned it slowly to focus in on the piece of cake on the living room coffee table. My hands were trembling as I hit the shutter button, but my shakyness was quickly put to ease by the sound of my camera click. It was one of the most soothing sounds to me, and picture after picture that I took, I felt my camera get lighter, and my face start spreading into a wider smile.
By now, my hangover was mainly gone and I was scurrying around my place, snapping pictures of everything I found interesting. Taylor's discarded t-shirt from last night. My open lipstick tube in the bathroom. Mickey's jersey hanging peacefully in my closet. Finally, I headed back to the living room, snapped a few pictures of the discarded bottle of Jack Daniels on the ground.
As soon as the smell hit my nose, I felt myself get nauseous. I covered my mouth with my hand, tossed my camera on the couch, and sprinted to the washroom. My knees hit the cold tile floors, and I gripped onto the toilet seat tightly as I began throwing up bile by the bucket load. My eyes began to water up, and tears began to flow, something that always happened whenever I got sick. I heard the front door open as the bile kept coming. Then out of nowhere, Taylor was kneeling beside me, pulling my hair away from my face and rubbing my back in circles. I clenched onto his hand as I finally felt my nausea subside. I got up and wiped my mouth clean, as Taylor took the edge of his sleeve to wipe away the tears from under my eyes.
I managed to half smile as I grabbed on tightly to the boy who loved me, and pulled him into a tight hug, feeling all of his muscles tense on top of me.
And I knew he wouldn't let go.
Practice this morning, sorry I'm not there to help ease your hangover. Take the Advil, and I hope you feel better soon. I should be back around 11.
ps: Chocolate cake in the fridge. Score.
pps: I found your camera, it's on the living room table. Pick it up?
ppps: I love you.
-T
I felt a grin appear on my face and I slid the note back onto the table, picking up the Advil and glass of water and downing the two pills and half of the water. ppps: I love you. He said he loved me. He loves me. I simply shook my head and smiled. I walked over to the kitchen and grabbed the chocolate cake out of the fridge, laughing a little at the smiley face Taylor had attempted to draw on the cake in whipped cream.
He tried so hard to make me forget about everything that has brought me down in the past couple of months, I don't know what kind of person it takes to be that kind of constant tower of support with almost no backup. I've been so involved with mourning my loss, that I've almost forgotten how hard this must be on Taylor too.
I knew that even if this romantic stint we've been going on ended for one reason or another, he'd always be my best friend. He'd always be there. He was stable. I could say anything to Taylor, and he'd always be supportive of me. As I walked towards the couch, I saw my camera laying on the table, and it made my head spin. I hadn't touched, or even looked, at my camera since Mickey died.
Mickey was the one who bought me my first camera, signed me up for my first course, and encouraged me to apply to Ryerson for the fall. Everything about my photography had to do with Mickey. I stared at my camera blankly. I didn't move. I finally took a deep breath, reached out for my camera, and held it for the first time in two months. It felt different now, for some reason, my camera felt heavier, like there was a bigger weight being carried around with it.
Attached to the shutter button was a yellow post-it note with the words Use me scribbled on in Taylor's hand writing. I hit the power button, and heard my camera begin to adjust itself to the lighting in my living room. I felt my hands tighten around the lens, as I turned it slowly to focus in on the piece of cake on the living room coffee table. My hands were trembling as I hit the shutter button, but my shakyness was quickly put to ease by the sound of my camera click. It was one of the most soothing sounds to me, and picture after picture that I took, I felt my camera get lighter, and my face start spreading into a wider smile.
By now, my hangover was mainly gone and I was scurrying around my place, snapping pictures of everything I found interesting. Taylor's discarded t-shirt from last night. My open lipstick tube in the bathroom. Mickey's jersey hanging peacefully in my closet. Finally, I headed back to the living room, snapped a few pictures of the discarded bottle of Jack Daniels on the ground.
As soon as the smell hit my nose, I felt myself get nauseous. I covered my mouth with my hand, tossed my camera on the couch, and sprinted to the washroom. My knees hit the cold tile floors, and I gripped onto the toilet seat tightly as I began throwing up bile by the bucket load. My eyes began to water up, and tears began to flow, something that always happened whenever I got sick. I heard the front door open as the bile kept coming. Then out of nowhere, Taylor was kneeling beside me, pulling my hair away from my face and rubbing my back in circles. I clenched onto his hand as I finally felt my nausea subside. I got up and wiped my mouth clean, as Taylor took the edge of his sleeve to wipe away the tears from under my eyes.
I managed to half smile as I grabbed on tightly to the boy who loved me, and pulled him into a tight hug, feeling all of his muscles tense on top of me.
And I knew he wouldn't let go.
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